End of the hectic weekend and back to cold office tomorrow :\

I suppose I will describe the weekend when I'm not feeling so damn tired -.- Die have to wake up in 7 hrs time.. Am currently uploading videos and photos :D

Hmmm.. Feeling hungry.. I supposed it's natural since brunch was more than 12 hours ago and dinner wasn't exactly alot since brunch was damn filling..

Broke!

Time to sleep........

Shiori came!

A rather fun day, thanks to the rest of the crazy people for entertaining her.

The only downside was that my parents actually thought I was senseless enough to do drink driving. Or that I drink, even.

ADAD

is a terror, but nonetheless a nice person when he's not in the interview room. I think I'm very impressed by him as a person contributing to society. He just amazes me with all the knowledge he has in that mind of his, although somewhere in that mind we are all insects and arachnids -.- Haha.

Well, and not to mention that he heard me complaining that I'll reach Shermaine's house late for tuition yesterday (and it was cancelled in the end), and he offered to let us get off work one hour earlier today. *beams*

Had a terrible scare this morning. Luckily it was lost and found, not lost and not found.. Sweats.

Pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will

Interesting topic to talk about.

"Is the cup half full, or half empty?" - This is normally how people gauge whether one is pessimistic or optimistic. Strangely, I think people answer that actually based on impulse. Would you really go deep in thought over whether it's called full or empty?

Had a miniscule discussion this morning with ze over pessimism and his quote: The law of pessimism: The law of pessimism: For every 50-50 chance of getting it correct, 90% of the time you'll get it wrong.

And so I was arguing that in reality, that 50% stays as 50% because actually no one will complain if they get something wrong.. You only hear complaints when something goes wrong, and therefore the misassumption of 90%. --> There's nothing to be proud of when you get it right for a 50-50 chance thingy. Lol.

Happy pessimist: sounds ironic, but that's what he described himself as. Argument: Happy or sad is mutually exclusive (omg stats term) from the thought process. Counter argument: If you're born a pessimist, then wouldn't your subconscious just tell you that "no this will not work" and hence affect your mood? Counter counter argument: A pessimist is always bound to be right, or have a pleasant surprise. Hence since they always expect the worst.. Anything above that makes them happy.

In the end I was confused by whether a pessimist or an optimist will be happier. Haha.

Optimism and pessimism are the opposites from the philosophical point of view, but not from the psychological point of view. And hence the title of the post. Being more pessimistic doesn't mean that you are less optimistic. In fact from pessimism of the intellect, optimism of the will, it strongly indicates one spurs to action, having the resilience to believe that action will result in meaningful change even in the face of adversity.

Still trying hard to absorb the earlier statement :D

Too many types of different optimism and pessimism to delve into; moral pessimism, naive optimism, pessimism realism, etc. Too chim a subject.

Me, I think I'm a pessimistic optimist. :]

Enlightenment

Vincent finally enlightened me today, what me and all the rest of the people have been wondering for so long.

At least if I have to fail, let me know a reason and not leave me hanging. At least now I know a probable reason.

Which ironically, is impossible to change already.

Mitch Albom

In light of having the PSP truly returned to its original owner, I start doing what I normally do when I'm bored: Digging out old books to reread. The advantage and beauty of buying books :)

And so for this couple of days I was rereading "The Five People You Meet in Heaven", and then I realize that I still love this book as compared to when I first read it. Generally I was told that Tuesdays with Morrie was the big hit and The Five People You Meet in Heaven was just something that came along after that big hit.

Not for me. I liked Tuesdays with Morrie, but I preferred The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Both are insightful books, but I guess The Five People You Meet in Heaven just hit me harder than Tuesdays with Morrie did. I have no idea why, but the impact upon reading the book was as good as the first time when I bought the book and read it the first time round. I guess life after death is just something that everyone would be curious in. And I happen to like the way life after death is presented in the book. An explanation of what went through in your life, and the impact and consequences of every little action that one takes. Anything could potentially steer another life in another direction forever. The complications of homosapiens' acts, and the interactive web that they weave in, huh.

I personally believe that life after death exists, because.. Life can't just simply cease to exist when the last breath is taken. I don't believe that. Afterlife HAS to exist. Somehow somewhat.

I'm just so taken with the book. Must have looked awfully silly on the train this morning when I was reading the later part of the book. :s

Meanwhile, Tuesdays with Morrie will be my companion for today and tomorrow at least. :) I wasn't very impressed with For One More Day, but maybe I should reread it again in case I change my mind.

The same old condition came back this morning when it's disappeared for a while, and I didn't dare to wake up in case I scare my dad. Sigh.

And I need to send my phone in for servicing, soon. The space/0/next line is driving me nuts.. Can't even type a proper sms in peace now. And it takes me 3-4 times as long just to finish an sms :(

Friday

Past couple of days have been rather fun, going to take photos and what nots. The noisy temps rubbed themselves off me and I think I became as noisy as them -.- Charis and Chloe are just so sporty it's hilarious!

Tomorrow's a full day of class + tuition lessons.. Not very looking forward to it because it just seems so sian that my saturday is occupied with such stuff instead of going out to enjoy, or even sitting around in Starbucks reading a book.

I miss having freedom :\

No apt title

I've left draft.blogger on for a few days, but never once figured out how to update the stuff I wanted to type here. I think, what I'm feeling is a little to abstract and complicated to put into public words. So I tried going into private.draft today, and still nothing came out.

What's wrong??

Maybe I don't know how to organize my thoughts properly before putting them in pen and paper. I still think the good o' diary works best, except that it's literally pen and paper so after a substantial entry, the hands get tired from writing too much, and that is why, maybe not primarily, but certainly part of the reason why I ended up having a online diary.

Think I need to sort out my feelings and stuff right now. It's confusing until I can't even make sense of it myself. What's to say direction, goals, etc etc.. Can't envision myself 10 years down the road. And it's pretty scary that she's only 2 years older than me but getting all ready to get married, and then I'm thinking where will I be 2 years later? Though I'm still very very happy for her.

I know I'm pretty certain that NIE is the way to go, but who's to say I won't be bored after say, 5 yrs or even lesser? Even though I know I enjoy teaching tuition now, teaching a class is an entirely different thing as with the AHS stint. At the very least, I know I'm able to interact with the students and I do enjoy teaching. Need to sit down and reflect soon. And actually, I rather enjoy what I'm doing now. The young company's one thing, the fact that I'm learning new stuff is another thing. At least it keeps my brain from rotting.

If only I had seniors to talk to before I entered university to actually advise me on what the hell was going on and stuff.. Like I sometimes talk to the people younger than me right now, because I've been through enough during university to actually share some stuff. Strangely, all the seniors either disappeared, or disappeared when my batch entered university. No one to ask around, we all entered blindly and without ample information. Maybe I could and would have different stands, maybe I wouldn't be in Science, maybe I would have taken up other stuff, maybe this, maybe that.

It's no good to always live in the past, so I only think about it once in a while. But honestly thinking back, some things I regret, others I don't. I actually don't regret the life I had after I've graduated, because well, what doesn't kill me only makes me stronger. I'll just take it as enjoying life before actual work starts. Perhaps the only thing I should regret is not concentrating enough in university to attain good grades so that I actually can choose which path I wanted to go.

And there's still the other part which I don't really wanna sort it out now. Homosapiens are always such complicated creatures.

And this is by far the latest I've slept in a month for a workday. Have to find some officers tomorrow at 8.30 sharp. Bah I should sleep.

Shopping day

It's been too long since I last shopped properly, albeit today's was only around Tampines area. 4 hours straight of shopping left my legs very sour -.- Too long nv shop le!

Bought 2 tops (+ a half) and already spent around 80 bucks -.- G2000 sales are really worth a look for executive workwear, and even the guys' clothes are buyable! Ok, not that I buy them, but well last season's clothes really look quite -.- At least this season's clothes are decent :D Only got a top from G2000 because the shirts are none too pretty, and I bought a similar one to my first G2000 long sleeved shirt. So now I officially have 2 long sleeved shirts, heh. But too bad, the top that I really really wanted is gone probably because I'm too slow and it went away with the last season, :(

Went around to JOOP and found another pretty top there. Been quite into a ball of fur lately. :D Bought this crochet low cut top which has a really pretty shade of blue, with a neat 40% discount. I think since my first crochet top, I'm rather into crochet, especially these days!

My first crochet top


When I was having my G2000 craze


And tada my spoil for today!


Crochet *love*

Popped by into Adidas because of a sudden impulse to get a jacket. Missed my old blue one. Lol. Nothing spectacular though, so I was out in a jiffy.

That said, I still need a pair of decent shoes to go to work. AND I want to see if Citylink's Mintmark still has 50% sales.. Tampines don't have :( And Mintmark Tampines is moving to ION Orchard at the end of this month :(

Came back home to find nice nice curry fish + veggies and steamed egg waiting. It's been too long since I last ate properly with my entire family.

How I wish everyday is this carefree.

Very early sunday morning

i think i'm quite used to waking up early. Not that this is the entire reason why I'm up now.. It's probably just because I got awakened by a msg, or because this isn't the hard hard bed that i'm getting more and more used to nowadays..

Half a year later, in the end I'm still a closed box.. So much for new year resolutions. Haha. I think I might never change in that sense though, so forget it..

To Yuxin, Yuenling and Clement, if anyone of u read this before meeting time, can we meet earlier? Lol. Tuition's suddenly cancelled resulting in a 3hour lapse in between.. Bah.. But of cos i'm kidding because no one would change a time like that via blogger. Lol.

Bah.. Don't even know why I'm typing this entry..

I want to go back to learning french..

TGIF

I've this weird feeling since morning that has nothing to do with any euphoria whatsoever about the fact that today's friday. Shrugs. I think, too many secrets to keep and too many things not said. I'm exploding! Haha.

A talk with melsa led me to realize that I haven't really seen her since Jan 08 when she flew off to Sweden -.- And then I realized that there's actually a lot of people whom I've not contacted since I came back from Switzerland. I should make some proper effort to meet up people like Huey Chyi, Rachel, and singulars like that.

Bored, because officers are out and hence what I wanted to ask has to be held back until they come back.

I think I desperately want my weekday nights back somehow. Cannot go on going like this until the end of the week and then feel so cui. It's so easy to just escape everything, but I'm not that that stage yet. Just a mini stage.

Towards the end of the week

there is always a very lethargic feeling.

I realize that I don't really like to stare at the com at home nowadays, when I've already been staring at the com for the entire day at work. So I just end up shutting down my computer earlier and earlier and entertaining myself with psp or talking on the phone or sleeping earlier. Which reminds me that I'm old and should get more sleep -.- But sadly the psp is going back to its original owner tomorrow.

Sometimes I wonder why I make myself so busy. I think everything stems from the fact that I try not to reject anyone, which results in 24 hrs a day is also not enough :s I think 30 hours will be just nice. 3 hours more for sleep, 3 hours to make up for the missing night free time that I have every day. :(

I am just feeling more and more guilty towards the fact that I see my mum once a week.

Very happy for my cousin :)

Slacking

And slacking and slacking and still slacking.. Boss will only come in tomorrow, after which real actual tedious work has to start.

So slack and slack now! Wonderful high speed optic fibre wire or whatever nonsense sponsored by Singtel :D Lots of high tech stuff. Fascinating!

Well rested weekend

So much better as compared to last week, ahahaha.

Slept for a full 9 hours on friday, choosing to stay home instead of going out for another crazy night and end up stoning at jap again. So I fell asleep at 11 plus and woke up only at 9 =D Haven't felt so awake in a very long time wor.. So ridiculously happy at having slept enough muahahaha.

Saturday was a very unhappening day as compared to last week, because we only went out for dinner after practice and then went home :) So I got more sleep than I expected because I reached home before 12, then slept at 1plus and only woke up at 9 again for tuition.. Heh.

Next week will be another busy week with more activities and outings. I WANT TO EAT THE SUNTEC PORRIDGE BUFFET LA! It smelled so heavenly today :( Have been having irregular meals nowadays. Should spare a thought for my gastric.

Gracie's coming back tomorrow :D

Too coincidental day

Met ze for lunch today, so I didn't go with the temps, and not with YP as well. He brought me to a place Grace brought him the last time round, and after deciding to go in and looking at the menu, the whole bunch of temps trooped in. 0_o And it was some walk away from our building, no less. Who would have thought that all of us will be so hardworking to walk down to the same place for lunch.......

Better still, when we were about to leave, YP, Vincent, Jes and Steph came in. 0_o I confirm have some explaining to do when they come back -.-

AND the One North bus which I just happened to notice on our way back had Jeffery waving from inside the bus like mad.

What is this?!?!?!?!

Too coincidental day. Haha. But lunch was good. Lots of information exchange. Hahahahaha.

Air France Airbus A330

126 men, 82 women, seven children and a baby. Crew comprised 11 French nationals and one Brazilian.

Such is life. All gone. Nothing left..

1 minute of silence.

Been following the news closely. Seems that there isn't an ounce of hope for these people.. Their families must be devastated. Must feel lucky now to be even able to stare at the computer screen with loved ones still safe and sound. The kids had barely any chance to see the outside world. :(

Black box, surface soon yea?

SLEEPY!!!

Roar........

I just want to close my eyes and sleep :(

Why is it only 1630!!!!

If every weekend was this happening, I think my lifespan will be shortened by 10 years -.- Coupled with the fact that I used to wash my hands with acetone, breathe in plenty of air in labs, and various I don't-know-why-I'm-involved-de-karma, I think I will die at age 30. Faints!